The first instinct when something hurts is to fix it. Find the cause, name it, do the work, make it stop. That instinct is so automatic it feels like wisdom.

But some pain is not a malfunction. It is a measurement. It is telling you what you cared about, what you committed to, what you stood close enough to lose.

Treat that kind of pain like a problem and you spend years trying to talk yourself out of having loved something.

I used to think healing meant the ache going quiet. Now I think it sometimes means the ache staying, and you stop needing it to leave before you can keep living.